Thursday, June 01, 2006

Pondering the ages

I seem to have gotten engaged in a number of conversations lately regarding age – people who do or don’t look their age – act their age, etc. While I’m not a big worrier about getting older – it does inspire me a bit.

I was only 25 when one of my good friends in DSM was turning 30, and freaking out about it. I didn’t understand why and her comment was ‘just wait 5 years and you’ll understand’ Well – 5 years later I turned 30 with one of the biggest and best birthday celebrations ever – and lovin’ every minute. It was at that age of 30 that I then met my wonderful husband – to me turning 30 was fantastic.

Now at 35 I have friends starting to turn 40 – some are doing ok with it, others are freaking out a bit…and I still don’t understand. I know that they’re probably thinking – just you wait – but honestly it doesn’t bother me now and I don’t think it will then. But I think it has more to do with the way that we live our lives.

A gal that I do flags with in the OMTAAMB told us last year that she was getting ready to go to her 40th class reunion. We just about fell off the bleachers – there’s no way she was a day over 45 let alone nearly 60 – but sure enough. This same woman points out to me that another flag members mom who always comes to watch is the same age – 60 – as she is. Again – falling off the bleachers – only 60? I would have put her closer to 80. So they’re both 60, but Nancy looks in her 40s and this other woman in her 80s.

Not to that same extreme, but it’s interesting to look at your family and how old they seem. My Newman side grandparents seemed old for as long as I can remember. Much older than the Amble side grandparents. But the Newmans were retired as far back as I can remember, grandma baked and canned and quilted and all those “grandmotherly” things, grandpa was a bit crotchety and cranky the way old men are. They talked about ‘darkies’ and the days when children respected adults.

My Amble grandparents had a cabin in the woods where we rode motorcycles and went out in the boat. We always had to say please and thank you, but grandpa loved to buy the latest and greatest new gadgets and anything modern.

I can see the same sort of different in my parents and Noland’s. And maybe it’s just a skewed perspective because it’s hard to see your own parents getting old – he may think just the opposite – but I never knew his parents when they were younger. I do think that if I were to meet the two independently I would assume that his folks were at least 10-15 years older than mine. Just in their mannerisms, the things that they believe in….his parents have been retired for as long as I’ve known them – my dad just retired and my mom is still working. A Saturday afternoon could find his mom baking, quilting or canning. It could find my mom at lunch having margaritas with her girlfriends.

But to give them both credit – they are all close to the same age as the two women at flags – and neither of our sets of parents seem as young as Nancy – nor as old as the other woman.

I don’t know that there is a point behind all of this rambling – but just an interesting perspective I guess.


The Hamzinger said...

It's pretty obvious then - our parents must meet in a dance off! BAM!

divebarwife said...

I SOOOOO don't want to see my mom dance!